You big bully

I have had this on my mind for months now and after my 13 year old daughter showed me a post on FB yesterday I decided it was time to put my thoughts out there.

There is a lot of talk about bulling going around. Tragic stories of kids and teens getting bullied in school and ending with the victims taking their own lives.

We as adults are disgusted. We are heartbroken. We are angry.

How can people be so cruel?! How can one person look at another and make such hurtful comments?!

I will not at all be giving excuses for these bulling teens.

I do however what to say that I have also seen many adults doing the same thing. Grown adults. Mothers. Fathers.  Yes, doing the same.

The post my daughter brought to me, and was appalled herself by, was a status on FB from a women, a mother. It was a picture that her husband had taken of a lady having lunch with her elementary child at school. The picture showed her pants coming down in the back revealing her undergarments.

My daughter pointed out the comments that followed. So many adults laughing at the picture.  Giving virtual high 5's, patting them on the back for capturing such a moment. One person describing a person dressed badly that she wished she had taken a picture of.
One comment even said something like, how did she not know her *** was sticking out,  that's an insecure person that needs attention.

Really people?!! Really?!?! 

There have been times that I have very embarrassingly reached behind me to find that my pants were low. I had no idea! One would think you could feel a breeze or something but nope. 
And to have someone accuse one of having insecure issues. Wow. 

I have seen adults online take pictures and post them all over FB making fun of how big someone is, how they eat, what they are wearing, even a ladies un-manicured toes in the bathroom stall beside them.  Yeah, ok. So you are sitting on the pot taking pictures of the person next to you.  No comment.

On any given day, if you took pictures of me in public you would definitely get a good laugh. In that split second that you have a window in my life you could definitely have FB worthy photo's for the world to laugh at. 

And that is one reason I would never do that to you. 

“So whatever you wish that others would do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets." - Matthew 7:12

Oh it's all just fun and games. A good laugh. 

Really? 

Is that what our teens are thinking? 

No harm done. 

"Let there be no filthiness nor foolish talk nor crude joking, which are out of place, but instead let there be thanksgiving" - Ephesians 5:4 

When I see adults post making fun of someone I think, what if that was a kid posting about one of their children? Would you now find that so funny? 

Come on guys. We need to be an example to this generation. They are watching us.
Like I said, I am not making excuses for teen bullying, but they have to get it from somewhere. and they do see us. They hear us. Let's show this generation how to respect others. Look for the good.

"Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear" -Ephesians 4:29

"Finally, all of you, have unity of mind, sympathy, brotherly love, a tender heart, and a humble mind. Do not repay evil for evil or reviling for reviling, but on the contrary, bless, for to this you were called, that you may obtain a blessing." - 1 Peter 3:8-9

If you need a good laugh stick to watching things like this
 
And next time you're out in public and you see a lady in need of a pedicure, why not be thankful that you can actually afford one.

But GOD

Our amazing, stubborn, sweet, strong, Gabe. WALKING down the aisle for his Kindergarten Graduation. 



As stated on the paperwork giving Gabe up for adoption, "We the parents acting on our free will, being in sound mind and clear memory, give up on our parental rights towards him 
because of bad material condition".



BUT GOD












 

"For I know the plans I have for you. Plans to prosper you and not to harm you. To give you HOPE and a FUTURE"

Kole. Ours FOREVER

We have been home 10 weeks now since going to Ukraine to adopt our newest little man. Can I just tell you how absolutely amazing my Kole is. Man I love this boy. There are moments that I sit and wonder how I got to be so blessed to be his mom. I think about him growing up and picture all the laughs and smiles he will bring and then remember that he is MY SON.

Here are some recent facts about our boy:

Kole is 5 years old and has down syndrome.

He is super smart. Dresses himself, eats by himself. He loves to pretend cook and clean.

He is non-verbal but loves to imitate so I am sure he will be talking in no time. He has actually already said the word "hot" and will touch a coffee cup or bowl and say hoooooootttttt.

He has a few signs, his favorite one being "help" which he does in slow motion and very exaggerated.

He is not potty trained but will go if I put him on the toilet. We will be working on time training soon.

He is busy busy busy all day. He always has something in his hands and usually a hat on his head.

He loves clothes. If you leave anything laying around he will put it on.

He is VERY sensitive and will cry loudly at the smallest fall or when being told no.

He is very bossy;) He "tells" all his siblings what to do and not do all day by pointing his little finger at them and shaking his head.

He is shy with new people but once he gets to know you he loves you.

He will pass me during the day and hug my leg, and will randomly plant kisses on my cheek all.day.long. I melt every time.

He is a great sleeper. Although he wakes up most mornings and starts playing in his kitchen and recently has been undoing Levi's lock on his bed tent and letting him out! Silly boys.

Life around here is busy. Having 3 boys in diapers, non-verbal, and needing help in many areas is like having triplets most of the time. Guy is starting full time college in January while still working full time. This will mean that my main helper and support will be gone for the next 2 years. Yes, I am having anxiety already! My plan has been to get as organized as possible with school and all our daily activities so hopefully I can be a somewhat sane mother;)

I am so blessed that God allowed me to be Kole's mommy and look forward to days full of kisses, laughs, and new adventures.


A little late, but I have finally made Kole's Coming Home video which also has photo's from his last 10 weeks being home. Enjoy!

You're my Baby, you're my Sunshine

We are still here in Ukraine. Our adoption of Kole is almost complete and we are totally IN LOVE. 

Thank you SO MUCH to all of you that helped make this happen!!!! 

Words could never express how grateful I am. 

I've dreamed of this for a year. 

I love that when you give your heart completely to God, He will give you what you desire. 

 

"This Love" by Mandi Mapes

Introducing the latest little "House" member

I've always enjoyed naming my children. I like different kind of names, and one's that have a special meaning

Genesis Lin = "Beginning" She is our first and the Beautiful Beginning to our family. Lin was after me

Jude Steven = "Praise, Thanks". Steven means "Crowned" and is named after my Dad and my older brother

Zane Adrien = "God is Gracious".  Adrien is his Daddy's middle name

Gabe Artem = "God is my Strength" Artem was his given first name

Levi Vitalik = "Joined in Harmony" Vitalik was his given birth name

And our newest little one we have named....



Well first I have to tell you how we came to name him!

All my kids have a story behind their names, so of course I have to share his. 

You know we have been calling him Kole and that is because after hearing the nannies all call him Kolya last year,  which sounds close to Kole, we decided that he recognizes his name and we should keep it close to what he is used to

We will be keeping his given name on his birth certificate which is Mykola, pronounced = mi-cola
But we will call him Kole

And for his middle name we decided to name him after my two younger brothers,
Luke and Adam



My brother Luke

 My sisters, Tanya & Kara, Luke and Me



I'm sure he is sick of hearing me tell this, but when he was a baby he would call me,  Mommy Ninnie. He couldn't pronounce Lindy, thus the Ninnie

I was a second mommy to him. Dressed him, fed him, and changed his diapers

Nice thought huh Luke?

The comedian of the family. From a very young age he had the ability to make anyone laugh. He is the only sibling out of 6 that could get out of a spanking by waving his bottom back and forth and saying, "Hit the moving target"

Witty, hard working, generous, selfless, compassionate, comforter

That's my brother Luke

I cannot wait to see what God has in store for him cause I know with God, Luke is gonna do some amazing things!

Watch out world

There is no stopping the moving target



Then there is the baby of the family, Adam
 
Amber and Adam's Engagement Photo. Their wedding is next month!  


There are 15 years between the two of us

I  practiced my mothering skills on him too when he was little

Dressed him, fed him, and yes, you know the rest

I learned early on that he was a carbon copy of my older brother, which is crazy since he was only 1 year old when my older brother moved away

I also learned quickly that when you are on the road and he asks you how much longer, do not say a couple minutes. Because after 2 minutes he will tell you that it has been exactly 120 seconds and we aren't there yet like I said we would be. Adam at the age of 5 could add and multiply better than any adult in the room

My Jude man is a mini Adam. His humor, gentleness. And my Zane has Adam's obsession with numbers

Adam has a passion for learning but most importantly, a passion for God

Strong, smart, caring, focused, patient, giving

I am supper blessed to have Luke and Adam as my little brothers

I love that I can call them friend

So it is with great pleasure I introduce to you,

Kole Luka House

Kole: Victory of the People
Luke: Light
Adam: Earth 
Oh yes, this boy is gonna rock this world!

 

Leaving the flock for our little lost sheep

You know that parable where the Shepherd leaves his flock to find the one lost sheep.



Growing up I would hear that story and wonder if the Shepherd cared for that lost one more than all his others.

Was it easy for him to up and leave the rest behind.
 
As I sit here hundreds of miles away from my 5 sheep children I wonder about that journey the Shepherd made.


 

This journey to Kole has been a long one.

It's cost so much financially, emotionally, physically.

Leaving my children behind for many weeks was one of the hardest things I had to do.

I love my children. Adore them.

Not a day on this journey goes by that I don't think about my kids.

How much I miss them and would love to be back with them right now.

But Kole needs us.





He needed us to come searching for him and to bring him back, home, where he belongs.

Now I know.

On those days that I feel like my Shepherd isn't near. When it seems that He is spending all His time with someone else that is hurting. Lost.

I know.

He is thinking of me. 

He loves me. Adores me.

Sometimes though there are others that are hurting and need my Shepherd.

The great news is that in the end, we will all be HOME. Where we belong.

Spending Eternity with our Shepherd.

Mommy's Tears

My heart broke this morning.

As I walked into the front office of Kole's orphanage I saw a father sitting on the couch holding a beautiful baby boy. One look at his almond shaped eyes and adorable stubby fingers and I knew right away that the baby had down syndrome.  He looked to be about a couple months old.  He was cooing and looking at his daddy's face smiling while his daddy stroked his arm. The mother was sitting beside them, tears pouring down her face.

My facilitator said it was a sad moment because they were leaving their baby at the orphanage.

Beside the couch were bags full of baby blankets, toys and diapers.

I wonder if there was a day that that young couple was overjoyed to have a son.  I bet they excitedly got a little room all ready for his arrival placing those fuzzy blankets and colorful toys in his crib. 

When did that joy turn to sadness.  Did they know right away that their long awaited son had down syndrome. Did they look at their son and think that maybe it would be ok. Maybe they could parent a child like this.

Just look at him. Look at his sweet face. Listen to his laugh. How can this be a bad thing?

Maybe he has a heart condition they can in no way afford to have fixed. Maybe a family member is telling them that this kind of child is no good. That children with down syndrome are violent and have no chance of having any kind of future here in Ukraine.

Whatever the reason, one thing I know for sure. That mommy and daddy WANTED and LOVED their baby boy. It was ripping the mothers heart out to place her baby in a strangers arms to now care for in this institutional setting.

What can we do to change this mentality? It wasn't long ago that children with down syndrome were institutionalized in America. And even now we put to death 90% of children that are diagnosed with down syndrome while still in the womb.

I wanted so badly to tell this mom that down syndrome is not the end, it can be the beginning! These children are wonderful and beautiful. They can have a great future.

I pray that precious baby boy will know love. I pray that years will not go by living in the orphanage causing him to bang his head just so he can feel. That he will not form the habit of gouging his eyes or rocking strongly back and forth, back and forth. I pray that he will soon have a family that will help him to grow into all that he is meant to be.

I pray for his birth mother and father, that God will heal their broken hearts.